Currently Things I've Learned from Women Who've Dumped Me By Colbert, Forte, Hornby, Richter, Savage, Ben, Stephen, Will, Nick, Andy, Dan Karlin (editor) see related

"i done strung along and strung along going this way and that.  whatever way would lead me to a moment of peace.  thats all i wanted to be easy with everything but i wasn't born to that.  i was born to a time of fire." in 'piano lesson' by august wilson

i am in full wedding planning.  the design motif is birds. 

i remember visiting my grandmother and watching 'reading rainbow' in the guest bedroom of her dusty house. my favorite time in these slow paced visits happened in the early morning.  my grandmothers kitchen table sat facing the carport, a metal roofed eyesore except for the bird feeders lining the perimeter.  she had nectar for humming birds, big seeds and small.  we would sit and eat breakfast while grandma pointed out what each bird's species and statistics were.  i remember watching the play together and bathe and seemingly cuddle.  they were fascinating.

when my grandmother had a stroke on the way back from scrabble night at the community center, my grandfather pulled her out of the car, layed her down on the carport concrete and wept until the ambulance got there. i think in an age of cynicism, this is one of the best promotions for long term companionship i can conjure.  if brad can play scrabble with me even when he hates scrabble, i think we have a good start on the path to longterm partnership.  it is scary with its unknowns and big commitments, but as i nuzzle my nose into his broad shoulder i can't help but feel that in some cosmic way-he's my guardian angel, my red headed cherub sent to calm me, to ground me, to love me till death do us part.